Music documentaries are a dime a dozen these days. In just the past three years, a handful of A-list artists, including Billie Eilish, Taylor Swift, Jennifer Lopez, Travis Scott, and Ariana Grande have given fans behind-the-scenes access to tours, recording sessions, special performances, and other career highlights through various streaming platforms. In an Entertainment Weekly article about this phenomenon, journalist Marcus Jones theorized that, for today’s biggest musicians, “becoming a cinematic subject has all but replaced in-depth magazine cover stories and network-TV sit-downs as an avenue for artists to reveal themselves in a new light.”
That said, it was only a matter of time before Selena Gomez, a fairly private and sometimes press-averse pop star, would use the medium to her advantage—although, seeds for a documentary had been planted as early as 2015. After watching Madonna: Truth or Dare, Gomez recruited director Alek Keshishian, who also directed her “Hands to Myself” music video (and is her manager’s brother) to follow her around on the world tour for her second studio album, Revival. However, their plans came to a halt when Gomez ended the tour after 55 shows, citing depression and anxiety as a result of her lupus. In 2018, she was admitted into a psychiatric facility.
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These bleak turning points would ultimately be the focus of Selena Gomez: My Mind and Me, out now on Apple TV+. The 90-minute documentary begins with troubling footage of the “Come and Get It” singer having emotional outbursts prior to the cancellation of her tour and resumes in 2019, after she’s been diagnosed with bipolar disorder. As implied in the title, the film helps fans understand the 30-year-old’s headspace over the past six years, as headlines about her physical and mental health have cast a shadow over her otherwise thriving career.
“Let me make you a promise,” she narrates at the start of the film. “I’ll only tell you my darkest secrets.”
How willing you are to believe this statement from one of the world’s biggest celebrities will shape your experience watching the documentary. Still, the summary Gomez offers of her previous mental-health struggles is about as heart-wrenching as one would expect, even if it’s a bit vague. The Only Murders in the Building star, as well as her friends and family interviewed in the doc, allude to her experiences with suicidal ideation and the wedge her bipolar episodes drove between her and her loved ones before she was diagnosed. Additionally, in a scene where she suffers a lupus flare-up, we see how dealing with a chronic illness impacts her overall well-being.